How Do We Stop the Bleeding?

“For every explosion inside you that I couldn’t understand, I’m sorry.”

It began sometime in the days when it was too much for my brain to comprehend. I cannot describe exactly what ‘it’ is, except that sometimes it was very loud and scary, and the other times, it was the eerie silence.
There’s good and bad in everyone. The defeating feat is finding the good amidst all the bad. Among all the smashed bottles, cigarette butts, broken glasses, hearts and dreams, where does one look for the good? How does one convince their heart that there is good at all? How does the curve that goes downward on the face ever resemble something close to a smile?
The coldness, the distance – Does it ever fade away?

Those eyes could look far beyond but they chose to focus at a particular place only to see if there was ever a car standing for it was a sight of terror, enough to make a heart beat faster or make a beating heart stop.

Fights. Cries. Running away.
Fights. Cries. Running away.
Fights. Cries. Running away.

The nights were silent, mostly. The others, however, were as thunderous as the monsoon nights where a full downpour was expected. Oh, must I say, the downpour was very well delivered. Relief hit like the strong rays of sun in the morning but the rays quickly gave way to the clouds again. For the part of the day that was yet to be lived, the heart felt so heavy, just like someone had been aiming stones at it and it was still, not budging at all, collecting the stones that were meant to hurt.

Let it be okay, please.
Let it be okay, please.
Let it be okay, please.

Somewhere between the claustrophobic, breathless nights and the horrible days, I lost a part of me to all the outside noise that was loud enough to destroy me a little on the inside. It went on for quite a while until it became a blur in my memory and slowly, in my life.
Let me tell you,
It gets better.
It gets better.
It gets better.

It was almost a terrible eternity, and I’d never expected it to stop hurting but it did. It took all the effort one could put in to make things work, and slowly, they did work. There were no more smashed bottles, cigarette butts, broken glasses or hearts. That downward curve became a smile. The coldness and the distance were faded away by the warmth and proximity. It took as long as it had to, but it only gave me a reason to believe in hope. Hope is such a strong yet a dangerous thing. It took years, tears, fights, feelings, hiding, showing, running away, coming back and forgiveness to one another.

But most importantly,

It took Love to stop the bleeding.