40 Day Challenge, Day 17: Leave and Cleave

AttachmentAs always, begin with the Prayer of Abandonment.

Today’s theme is ‘leave and cleave.’  Children who have been traumatized through early childhood experiences of abuse and neglect often have relational difficulties that extend into adulthood. One of the most important tasks of a foster or adoptive parent, particularly of older children, is to intervene in this cycle of trauma by seeking help on behalf of the child as well as the rest of the family, and walking with that child patiently and with gentleness, to find the path of healing.

Of course there are no guarantees, no magic elixir of healing. Love does not always heal every trauma, every wound. On the other hand, the child will be far better off because of your willingness to try.

The same can be true of adults, too. For those traumatized by early childhood experiences, or wounded from early relationships, marriage can  be a healing place if the spouse understands the dynamics, and is willing to walk alongside us with patience and gentleness. And yet, we must be willing to “leave and cleave,” to be willing to take the steps necessary to unburden ourselves, to change the ‘inner narrative’ in order to seek authentic intimacy.

Are there any battles you find yourself repeating with your spouse, that could signal unresolved trauma? Consider talking to someone about it, so you might be able to find the healing God wants you to have.

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