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please can I have a post? My 15 year old son is in bed poorly he’s just come dow…

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please can I have a post? My 15 year old son is in bed poorly he’s just come down in a t shirt looking for toilet roll and its the first time in ages I’ve seen him in just a T-shirt come to think about it but his arm was full of cuts lines and lines I froze and was like Darking what’s that on your arm? He looked At me and sort of panicked and said oh I fell down. I’m not stupid but didn’t push it and let him get back to bed. But I did say we needed a chat when he’s better. I’m completely shocked. He’s had a troubled few years but thought he was coming out the other end of it. Don’t know what I’m asking here perhaps guidance advice how to handle it. My mum committed suicide I’m terrified if history repeated itself x
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9 thoughts on “please can I have a post? My 15 year old son is in bed poorly he’s just come dow…

  • Just sit him down and ask him what they are, how they got there. Let him know and feel like he can come to you about absolutely anything and that he isn’t alone. Maybe take him to the gp so that he can see all the help out there for this kind of thing. Let him know it worried and upset you to see that and it’s upset you that he didn’t come and talk to you about it sooner. Don’t shout at him or get angry because I know what I was like as a teen and as soon as any member of my family starts getting angry I just walk out and don’t speak to them. You need him to tell you as much about what is going on for him to do that so that you know the right direction to go in to help him get through it. Xx

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  • I self harmed from the age of 12 until 23. My teenage years were the worst by a mile, first time my mum saw she was just as shocked as you, she was calm and helped me clean them, she hated me doing it obviously but there wasn’t much she could do but be there for me to listen if I wanted to talk. I haven’t self harmed in a year now.. During this talk ask him what he’s using, ask him to make sure if he is going to do it to make sure it’s clean.. Maybe give your GP a call and get him to CAMHS xx

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  • Ask him why he self harms first, there are different reason a person self harm. Once you find the reason that’s when you can start to get the help. Then go to the GP they will refer to CAMHS and possible counciling will be offered. Also you could ask him to put a rubber band round his arm and everytime he has thoughts of self harm to pull the band on his arm. It won’t stop the self harm but can stop the fleeting thoughts.

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  • As someone who suffers from depression and is suicidal quite often – the best piece of advice is to let him know you love him and that you are there for him
    Sometimes thats all we need to help pull us out of our bad days

    Other helpful tips would be not to force him into opening up if he doesn’t want to
    Don’t make him feel bad for self harming (some people do that, not saying you will or anything)
    See if he wants to get outside help ie someone to talk to or something

    Good luck with everything and I truly hope he manages to fight his demons
    Sending you and your family mass amounts of love ❤

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  • You poor lady. As a mum of a 16 year old it’s scary as they don’t open up (if he’s anything very like my son) Be there for him, try to talk but it’s not always easy for them to say. Listen lots and tell him how much you love him and that he can tell you anything. Can you talk to someone at his school in confidence? They usually have good pastoral support at high schools. I’m so sorry you and him are going through this. Life is tough enough without the worry. I hope he gets the help he needs. And please don’t blame yourself, teenagers hide things. Xx

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  • So sad hope everything ok at school as vicious shits can lead children to this kind of thing

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