We keep wanting to classify people as if this would in some way  give us a much better clue about a person’s identity and build a clearer picture of who they are. But, a marital status doesn’t define us and in some cases, it’s best not to disclose because of the negative implications. As is the “divorced” status. I’m in no way sure this would define me in any way.

To some, divorce is a failure, as if there were something wrong with you because  you couldn’t hold a relationship together. Often, when someone mentions; “I’m divorced,” people tend to look at one and say how sorry they are to hear. They actually look at you with pity. However, for myself, there is nothing wrong with being divorced, it’s LIFE!  Relationships end all the time. We change, we cannot get along, we simply don’t work together. It’s part of our story. It’s normal to leave if it no longer makes you happy. If you are not married, you are single and that’s that.

By no means do I believe we should keep it a secret, but when asked if you are in a relationship, a simple; no, or I’m currently single, will do. After a while, when we get to know people better, then, we may reveal our stories, as we usually do when we get to know people better.

I’m not “single,” and whatever that implies, or “divorced,”I’m myself . Many other things define me as my likes, dislikes, my opinions, my job, my family, my friends and so on, but not whether I’m single, married or widowed.

Let’s define people by their personalities, not  their relationship status.