Every Memorial Day weekend there is a uniquely local celebration, the Kinetic Grand Championship race. It’s had different names, and took a break for Covid, but has come back in force, showing the very best in community craziness. To me, this event is the essence of Humboldt. If you want to know why people choose to live here despite problems too numerous to mention, come for race weekend and you’ll have your answer.
This is a race of human-powered sculptures. The undercarriage of each sculpture is some kind of bicycle mechanism, and over that, anything goes. One of the best known entries is a fully enclosed flying saucer, stored locally and brought out for parades and special occasions. The size of the object and the number of people who propel it along the route depends on the creativity, and perhaps welding skills, of the makers. Though sculptural and covered with everything from paper to fabric to sheet metal, entries must move on their own. Racers lose points for having to tow their piece along the course. And what a course it is!
The Grand Championship is a three-day event, starting on Saturday morning at the Arcata Plaza. Throngs of people mob the plaza and surroundings, many wearing costumes. You don’t have to be affiliated with any particular entry, everyone is welcome, encouraged, to wear something outrageous. Men wear Barbie pink, women wear gold lamé, people wear rainbow wigs, black goth outfits, face paint, or just show off their tattoos.
Watch the short video to see the flame-throwing capability of one entry.
This year there were more than fifty entrants, from individuals to crews of six. Every entry recruits a pit crew, and followers (peons), costumed to match. Teams spend hours before the event making pins and badges, called “bribes” to give away. This encourages viewers to cheer for anyone who has given them a token, and makes spectators feel like part of the event. Last time, I got bribes from the three-humped camel, this year we are committed to Goth-Ham, going for that Hamtastic Glory.
When the race begins at 12 noon (ish), each piece navigates a route to the coast, then along a series of sand dunes, including “Dead Man’s Drop,” which seems to remove a certain number from the competition. I have not seen that part of the race because it is only accessible on foot or by bicycle. Racers turn inland after the dunes and Day One ends at the waterfront park in Eureka. Music and dancing ensue.
Day 2 takes entries into the water, where they paddle about 500 yards along the shore of Humboldt Bay, waving to spectators. The water is full of kayaks, paddleboards, and other boats full of watchers. Getting into the water is a big test, as each sculpture’s propulsion system has to be converted from moving tires on roads to moving water with paddles. Pontoons, kayaks, barrels, and other devices are used to make this happen. The line of sculptures waiting their turn to enter the water is a great place to take photos. I got a nice group picture of the Grateful Squid team. Sadly, when it was their turn to enter the water, the Grateful Squid itself made them top-heavy, dug its nose (?) into the water and stopped them in their tracks. (I spoke to a team member later and found they made it into the water on their second try.)
When (if) they emerge from Humboldt Bay, the race continues through Eureka to Crab Park, south of town, where there is an overnight encampment. I believe entrants get extra points for camping overnight.
What we notice is that everyone along the course is friendly. People make space for others to get a peek at the action, people chat, pet each others dogs (there are always dogs), and generally strike up conversation with people they don’t know at all. No politics, no antagonism among people of different looks. Everyone cheers, “For the Glory!” because that’s why we’re all there. I’m not sure there are any monetary prizes, but there are plenty of awards, For the Glory!
Racers getting ready to get wet.
L-R: Plan Bee, Full of Bull, Chick Magnet, and four others…..
Day 3 heads further south toward the finish line on Main Street in Ferndale, a small town with well-preserved Victorian Main Street. To get there, though, everyone has to cross the Eel River in their machines. The river is not very deep, and there’s usually a large sand bar midway, but it’s a challenge that can be hilarious. Not to minimize the risks, there are monitors along the course to make sure that no one gets hypothermia while trying to get in and out of the water. Rules for those trying for the biggest prize include not moving the vehicle forward with one’s feet. Getting unstuck from the river bottom involves a lot of paddling, rocking, and shouting. But no feet!
Successfully crossing the Eel River, racers head to the finish line in Ferndale.
The path from the shore to the road is not very clear.
Still, most everyone makes it to the finish line, though I understand that the first finisher was a sculpture that doesn’t brave the water, but gets trucked in. That’s a different category in the competition. The finale extends over about five hours of honking, the band playing, cheering, and general merrymaking.
Some of the finishers, and the Rutabaga Queen (elected at the Rutabaga Ball the night before the race begins).
A good time was had by all.
Article in Times Standard about the 2024 Kinetic Grand Championship