YSaC, Vol. 1006: I once was found, but now I’m lost …
2011 June 6
cat found ..free to good home
This cat came to our home and we can’t keep him. PLEASE.. if you know who owns him or if you would like him please email us. Thank you
I can see why they can’t keep him. It’s very difficult to contain Invisi-Cat. I mean, just look at the picture, and at the destruction Invisi-Cat has already wreaked on this poor hapless bathroom! He’s obviously already repainted it the color of his favorite tuna treats — I mean, nobody would choose that color on purpose, after all, so it’s clearly the work of the evil Invisi-Cat. Everyone knows Invisi-Cat is a terrible interior decorator.
Thanks, Nicole!
I wonder if this invisible cat just so happens to be a bobcat? Seems like those are starting to be found.
You mean “we can’t keep him (because he’s already eaten two of the children)”?
Neh, some people would still keep the cat.
More like “We can’t keep him because he has already eaten us”
This is the Emperor’s new cat.
I can see it, can you?
Of course I can. Why do you think I wouldn’t be able to? I got the memo.
It could be a cheshire cat.
Artsy – You and I came up with the same vision of that cat, proving that great minds think alike. But why in heck have I gotten more doors than you? I think everyone is just feeling sorry for me. Anyway, I’ve doored you and would do it again if I could. Now if I could just get this toothy cat-smile out of my dreams……..
“This cat belongs to E. Schrodinger, Vienna, Austria”
Sadly, if we mail him the cat, he’ll never open it.
And if he does, we’ll never know if it is dead or alive.
We find the small Viennese piano-player annoying for always having that noisy van Pelt character about.
We tolerate this only because of the steady stream of ionized particles are just lovely to bask in.
What?
Silly monkeys, insisting upon single-brane-phase existences.
Now, bring me treats.
In the dark of night, through all kinds of stormy weather, he fights for for life, liberty and the pursuit of …. cheese? Protecting dairy products from the ravages of field mice and protecting windows from damaging sunbeams, look… up in the sky… it’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s… Invisikitty? Wait, look on the ground, behind that tree… there’s Invisikitty! Or…. is he over there?
Where did he go? Somebody shake the treat can.
Ninja Cat,
Ninja Cat,
Does whatever a Ninja Cat does.
Can he swing
from a web?
No he can’t
he’s a cat.
Take a look overhead!
Hey there!
There goes the ninja cat!
The Felinious Ninjas are the name of my underground goth Josie and the Pussycats cover band. We don’t book shows in advance.
They put on a really good live show, but you’ll never see them in concert.
I tried to buy a t-shit at the last show, but all I got was an empty bag.
No, no. Check your bottom dresser drawer. It’s there.
“I tried to buy a t-shit at the last show, but all I got was an empty bag.”
Hum, Ghostie. I’m trying to decide if that was an accident. Or maybe you’re having the same keyboard problems I’m having: My “k” doesn’t always work. Maes me want to scream “Fuc!”
EDIT: Meaning you typed that you bought a t-shit, rather than a t-shirt. Or maybe you did buy a t-shit. Who am I to judge?
Nah…T-shit is correct. Thanks to a previous Tacoism, it means a shirt that one would really not want to own, or a cool idea, but highly improbable to own. Or whatever you want it to mean. I forget which post started it, so maybe someone else remembers.
It was deliberate, that’s a Tacoism from … I can’t remember how far back.
EDIT: What L-squared said.
I start more horrible/accidental Memes before 9am than most people do all day!
PUDDING NOT ON FIRE!
Hey, you can’t spell “infamous” without “famous”!
Well, you could, but most people wouldn’t. 😉
I’ve been really busy and haven’t had much time to lurk around here lately, but this exchange just reminded me why I have to make more effort to find the time.
Doors for everyone!
::gets the trebuchet::
P.S. FF doesn’t recognize “trebuchet.” This makes me feel smart for knowing more than the spellcheck (after I went and double-checked the spelling).
AR, you did go back and click the add-to-dictionary button, yes?
FF will remember the spellings you prefer that way.
Interesting idea, Cap’n, but how often do I use the word “trebuchet” anyway?
Hmm, that does make 3 times in as many hours, so I think you might be on to something.
::clicks “Add to Dictionary”::
Snuggles never was able to figure out how to work the timer on his owner’s camera.
It made his brilliant plan for escape – by being sold for free on Craigslist – all the more challenging.
Wonderland is certainly different than I pictured it.
SJ , sorry ghostcat– I knew that was a picture of you.
I think they got my good side.
Definitely!!!!
BATMAN PANTIES!
*runs away*
They are Hello Kitty panties. Get a grip Taco.
Get a grip is probably not a phrase you want to use when panties are the topic of discussion…
…unless this is a much more lurid discussion than I had originally assumed.
The WEDGINATOR, I presume?
:squints at photo:
I think those are my Green Lantern panties.
*still trying to shake image of handlebar-equipped drawers*
Been peeking in my panty drawer again, Cap’n?
Shouldn’t they be Cheshire Cat panties?
Hmmm, magical disappearing panties…
Well, the mad hatter has the camera for one thing…actually that’s not fair. The mad hatter would have chosen a better color for the bathroom than that. Plus the pictures would probably all be of socks.
This picture is really a still capture from kittyporn. Kitty is in the shower and will be caught on hidden camera when it get out to dry off. See the whole, torrid movie on www. lookatmykitty. com
Naughty, naughty Grampdaddy! I see you’re up to your old tricks again.
*passes flask approvingly*
Just think, Grampdaddy had to keep all of this inside for an entire school year. He’s probably ready to Grampdaddysplode.
Eeewww. Just who is supposed to clean that up?
We had the Lounge coated in Teflon after the first Tacosplosions, just set it to “potscrubber” and come back in an hour.
*accepts flask approvingly* I have to get a magic flask like this! Maybe on eBay??
By the way, love your hair in your avatar, Lola. Reminds me of when I was a young impressionable lad.
In my head, I can see one of our cats sliding back the shower door, reaching for a towel, stepping out on the bath mat, and butt flossing with one of my good towels.
You must have really big cats or really tiny towels.
both
Funny funky monkey! – are you the one who posted the video? If not, how come you know what the “plot” was, hmmmm?
I love little monkey,
Her smile is so happy.
If I was orang-utan,
I could be Grandpappy.
The cat is hiding behind the door waiting to grab some skin off a foot, like my crazy siamese does.
Yeah, that color scheme looks like a blind decorator selected it. And then the guy at Lowe’s that mixed the paint was blind. And in a hurry.
Were I not at work, I would count this the perfect time for an image of a sandwich floating in mid-air with the caption, “INVISIBLE CAT” in 48-point Impact. In lieu of this, please accept this mid-morning snack.
I see nothing wrong with that. Carry on.
What a bunch of bologna…….
Looks more like ham substitute and American flavored cheese product to me.
Perhaps Mystery Meat would be more accurate…….
OT – Lucky number 7!! Yep, my baby girl informed us yesterday that she is expecting a baby in early March 2012. She already has a 3-yr. old daughter.
This will make grandbaby number 7 and I am over the moon.
We now return you to your regular snarkaliciousness.
/end OT
Yay, Grandma!
Congra-due-lations!
Congrads CJ!!!!!
Woohoo!
Grandparent ALL the children!
Wait a minute, I think my Mom wants to keep hers.
Grandparent ALL the children!
Um, please God no? At least not this child. Really, it’s best for the world.
Hooray, CJ! Best wishes and health to them.
Thank you everyone!!
Babies!! SQUEE!!
One of my father’s prized possession is the t-shirt I got him that reads:
“If I’d known grandkids were this much fun, I’d had them first!”
Not always true, though.
According to one of Tron’s grandparents: “He’s nice enough to have over, but after half a day he starts to wear out his welcome.”
They should be happy; Tron only shows his true side to those whom he’s gotten used to. People who are still a novelty to him see the cute, happy toddler version. Unrepentant flirt, that boy. But once he no longer feels the need to flirt with you, he transforms into his real Mr. Hyde self.*
*Thus far the only thing that has really kept him in happy mode is his “cousin”. His “cousin” being my sister-in-law’s dog. When they’re together it becomes a “boy and his dog” situation. Really weird to see the transformation in the both of them when they’re brought together.
TM…truly I understand. My oldest daughter’s son is hell on wheels. His other grandma cannot handle him for more than an hour. Me, I’m smarter than he is, faster and craftier. He wears my ass out though…the cute li’l shit.
Both of my nieces are like that; adorable to strangers, coked-up spider monkeys to the family. It’s a good thing they’re so damn cute.
It’s the cute ones you have to be careful of. They know that they’re adorable so they can get away with more.
Ghostie : “coked-up spider monkeys”. I’m writing that one down.
Taco, Tron’s grandparents’ in question are obviously doing it wrong. Based on extensive experience, the role of grandparents is to (1) Wind the child up as tight as can be, (2) Feed them immense amounts of sugar and red dye, (3) Provide extensive opportunities for over-stimulation, (4) be sure the child does not get a nap, and (5) send them home with parent just prior to meltdown.
It is a matter of finesse and critical timing – an art, not a science.
Oh – step (6) laugh hysterically as child and grandchild drive away.
Yay, best wishes!!!
I wish more things came with free stuff like this. Buy a house, get a free cat. Buy this six pack of soda, get a free hamster. Buy this Range Rover, get an overinflated ego and a free giraffe!
Is it a petite lap giraffe? I’d totally buy a range rover if it came with a petite lap giraffe.
Uh, that was Ninja cat. This is a Petite Lap Giraffe.
My cats do that. Tears in my couch. Tears in my carpet runners. Tears in my curtains. Tears in my tiers.
My cat owns three Visine factories. Doing pretty good for himself, actually.
Dangit. Had the wrong link in my paste buffer. This paste buffer sucks at buffing paste.
Clear Eyes factories give out free beach balls.
DARN IT… another cool linky to watch. They have cameras on the PLGs!
Edit: Well now I’m confused…. I think I’ve just been hoaxed.
OMG… y’all… I need more coffee. I am mortified.
My only excuse is that I’m suffering from lack of sleep from visiting my new niece so often.
LL – I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
@Coff… seriously, painful… I know better, but the ol’ synapses are not firing in sync today.
Just tell me that “It’s Sam’s Birthday today”. (family joke)
It’s the Invisible Pink Unicorn’s sidekick, the Invisible Blue Cat.
Ninjacat is not amused at your attempts to take his picture.
Ninjacat will wreak terrible vengance upon you for this insult to his honor, right after his eighteen hour nap.
ninja cat has already wreaked vengeance; you just have not yet put those shoes on.
Obligatory ninja cat.
Do not play with Ninjacat, do not taunt Ninjacat, for you are crunchy and taste good with kibble.
I am pretty sure the picture is to give the reader a general idea of what a good home should look like. Keep in mind they want a good home, not a great home, or an impressive one. The cat they found is rather ordinary and does not deserve the best, just something that provides for basic needs. Since my apartment is just slightly larger than their bathroom I am unable to adopt the cat, oh sigh…
Ah, another entrance to Narnia. And, that’s Not.A.Housecat, that was a lion. What fools these mortals be.
Damn it Aslan! You’re supposed to use the gigantic litterbox not the toilet. Are you eating the toilet paper?! Get out of there!claps hands loudly then grabs the large spray bottle of water and heads for Sparky’s bathroom
I was just pondering what the consequence of using a spray bottle to punish a Christ allegory would be. I bet he poops in your shoes.
Probably sharpens his claws on that load-bearing wall.
He lets your mother-in-law in the house while you’re gone and shows her where you hide the dirty toys.
They’re in a shoebox under the nightstand.
Wait … What kinda toys are we talking about?
I’ll just be over here in my corner with the shovel, putting another basement in the bunker.
No no no, the toys are in the nightstand drawers, the BATTERIES are in the shoebox. Box-es. AAs are in one box, Cs in another, Ds in another. That big box under the bed stores the flashlight sized batteries and solar cells. If you need to go higher than that, there are extension cords in the bureau right underneath that swing hanging from the ceiling. Ignore the rubber suit and cat-o-nine-tails in the drawer.
I’m stepping outside to smoke.
Yes, FM, but what about the ball gag, gimp mask, and spiked boots? Are they fair game?
*passes ashtray and flask*
I had to send them to the cleaners.
Damn guacamole.
Lara: Maybe he just turns the water in the spray bottle to wine as a distraction.
Funky Monkey, you’re wasting a lot of energy there. You should try looking into solar powered toys, they’re more eco-friendly. Although you’d have to put up a big wall around your patio and try to find a way to soundproof it.
…I’ll be in the basement, inventing eco-friendly sex toys and selling them to hippies.
*Grampdaddy is blushing! My goodness ladies…..
Go rechargable, cuts down on waste and you can always move the batteries from the camera to ..a…. whatever, and vice versa.
Gecko in the box! Fresh coffee slices in the Lounge! Happy Monday, all around.
I’m basking in the sunshine right now. Is there a reason that this squeaky toy isn’t squeaking anymore?
Mindfield was in the box recently. Stay away from anything that smells funny.
Sorry about that. I had clown for lunch that day.
I tried eating clown once, but it tasted really funny.
I take it you were one of those who weren’t “Loving It”…?
Blech. Just thinking about it makes me grimace.
There’s nothing wrong with clown if it’s prepared properly. Try boiling slowling in Havoline, then serve covered with Brut.
Just a thought. Wish we had kept Mindfield in the box. 8(
Perhaps this kitty passed the How Not To Be Seen course that so many humans have failed.
Mr. Kitty, would you stand up please?
Mr. Kitty has learned the first lesson of not being seen, not to stand up. He also cleverly left his house and moved into a temporary flat and began posting erroneous craigslist ads saying he had been found by various other households. However, after tracing back his IP address, we were able to find the flat of apparemtns where he is currently renting a lovely 2 bedroom loft.
*KERBOOOM!*
I LOVE a pair of mountains!
They remind me of Dolly Parton.
Ok Kitty, would you please stand up. Stand up Kitty. Kitty has learned the value of not being seen.
We are amused at your puny attempts at not being seen.
We will have treats.
No, no, invisible, not inaudible.
I would probably like him if I saw him. I like most cats. I’m not sure why they want to know that.
The cat is obviously a vampire. It doesn’t appear in the mirror and it can’t be caught on film.
Zero. Zero cats Ah Ah Ah.
Count Catulator.
Vun! Vun mouzie! Two! Two mices! Sree! Sree mices! Spinach toothpaste sammich mices! Aah ah ahh!!”
One of these cats is not like the other…
As any good cat owner would recognize, there is a kitty in this picture. It’s sleeping in the sink.
Mine like to sleep in the bathtub.
Mine is compelled to come in every time I take a bath and then empty the tub, and watch the water go down the drain. Really.
Mine likes to lick the shower floor after I’m done taking a shower. Ew. Just… ew.
That’s because your skin cells are down there and he wants a taste of you while he waits. And watches. Biding his time. Waiting for the right moment.
My cat obviously should have been a physicist because she is obsessed with gravity. Everything falls.
Please tell me your cat’s name is Newton.
Mine hogs all the sunlight.
^^^^^^See?
My cat is obsessed with gravy. Everything spills.
Lola, I suppose I could offer to come in with the cat and keep both of you company while you bathe. Does your cat like it’s back washed? Does this seem too forward and/or obvious? I have no frame of reference since I only have dogs…
Well, running the shower “does things” we humans do not much perceive. Some of the gasses dissolved into our municipal water escape. There’s some creation/recombination of ozone. The water runs through the pipes all through the dwelling, something well within feline hearing (and brains organized to find rodents/prey under tall grass). Then, we add soap and other fragrances. If this were not enough, we also Close The Door.
So, there are Smells; there are Noises; and there What!Is!Going!On!In! There!?–all happening at once.
Or, it could be that the recombination of water molecules is releasing a torrent of leptons and mesons, and the cats enjoy warching them bounce off the mirror–but, that could be from having stayed up too late with particle physicists with too much tequila . . .
Quantum mechanics, Captain? Answer me this: If a clock is hungry, does it go back four seconds?
That is a trick question.
You did not indicate which flavor of quarks are involved.
And, as Herr Doktor Heisenberg kept finding out, the physics of a clock is a conglomeration of quantum stadia–but, die Deustche Zugbahn follows a schedule, and alles partikles heed it!
Why DO they like to do that? I think it’s cause it’s a good place from which they can pull a kamikaze on the other cats.
Obviously a Cheshire Cat, but he’s not smiling…….
But the cat came back, the very next day….
They thought it was a goner…
He just couldn’t stay away …
” Meeeeeooooowwwww ”
I wanna go watch it on YouTube now.
Curse you, work computer, and your lack of sound and video!
Pussy’s in the well.
It rubs the lotion on its fur.
Probably has got glitter claw polish—looks like “town”….*meeeeooowwww*
I bet the cat is named McAvity.
i think the cat’s name is “fog”
— c. sandberg
only if it has little feet.
This is what happens when you divide by zero in catmath.
You can divide by zero all you want in catmath, the only thing that happens is that socks disappear from your dryer.
This is what happens when you multiply by arugula cranberries.
And add the sqare root of sardine/marshmallow sammies….
It happens. every. single. time.
I never took Catmath while in school. I took Mouse Milking instead. Knew I would regret it.
You must have the smallest fingers EVER.
Well, I didn’t say how well I did in the class.
I find your monkey-insistence on visibility being binary amusing.
Now bring me treats.
It isn’t so much a question of visibility as responsibility. Clearly, as this cat is somebody else’s problem, you can’t look directly at it, but you can probably catch a glimpse of it out of the corner of your eye.
This spot o’ sunshine is mine.
And that one too.
Also, that one.
They’re all mine.
my steam of consciousness thought for the day: My best friend informed me that her cat has now taken to peeing in the toilet. And apparently does it pretty well.
Prolly better than my husband.
As a male, I would find that remark offensive if it weren’t completely spot on.
Wait, that didn’t come out right.
Does he put the seat down when finished?
*hands TOB some hair gel*
All that steam can frizz your hair.
And here I was impressed that I spelled consciousness correctly on the first try.
Don’t work my side of the streat, TBS!
I bet he’s just doing it to have an excuse to flush and watch the water “vanish”.
That’s the same excuse my husband uses.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edLtulahrl4&feature=fvst
That fits with what a couple of my friends (sisters) reported – when growing up, they had a cat who, all on her own, found her way to the utility sink and neatly aimed right for the drain (litter box employed for solids). Twice – as in, figured out where it was and used it in two different houses, with no instruction.
Yeah, my friend isn’t sure whether to be creeped out or impressed.
I would imagine that watching something like that occur would make me wonder if I had wandered into a Twin Peaks episode.
2B – here is your Twin Peaks episode: Flush…
This cat has accomplished what my son has not, albeit with a little more prompting…
Back when I lived in my trailer, if Simon got himself stuck in the bathroom he would “do his thing” in the tub drain. Never at any other time and he hasn’t done it since I moved, but he did do it.
Mine, Bugsy the Insane, will walk around the toilet seat….round and round and round…all the while keeping a steady commentary going.
That’s it.
That’s all he does.
When he tires of this game he goes off to hog more sunshine.
Told y’all he’s crazy.
I love you guys and gals. Just thought it was time to say that. Life is so up and down here, and so very peculiar.
We love you tooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*hugs owl/parrot*
parrots hugging owl
I love you too Windy.
“supposed to be heart symbol here”
*offers mouse to owl*
♥
(There ya go.)
Ok, still picturing paté d’coeur de souris . . .
(on tres petit talon-apropos toasts, naturellement)
DogpileGroup hug on the owl-parrot!Hearts and hugs and ‘nanners to the owl.
Mmm, ‘nanners for dessert!
Hugs to Windy, and here, have a fresh vole.
If it’s a hypoallergenic invisikitty, I’d totally buy it for free.
And name it Oxymoron?
The cat is obviously on the ceiling.
The person was just too drunk/confused/in awe to take a proper picture.
So in that case Sparky must have mistyped and meant “Bat.”
Or toupee
*munch, munch, burp* Oh, excuse me! This is the best vole and mouse casserole I’ve ever had. I feel much better now.
LimeLolly, Punchity Punch Punch!
G’Night, Archenland!
Thanks Windy. I only need a few more minutes and I can redeem them for that jello mold set that I’ve had my heart set on.
-crawls out of darkness- Oh. Look! My submission to YSAC. -crawls back into hidey hole-
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:snerk: ♫ you’re gonna get reported ♫ you’re gonna be in trouble ♪♪
LL – U such an early reptile! Please read rest of the funnies and have croissant and coffee slice. Pleasant Sunday to all……
The ad for this page is one seriously freaky looking red table. Sadly, I can’t take it, it’s not free.
I cannot possibly top anything that has already been said about this post. However, my first thought was “they are leading me into the bathroom to show me the lovely cat, but all there is in there is a killfloor”.
Ya know, fool me once…
Meh… I’m back to be fooled again. Long-term memory loss, ya know.
Got that from the War of 1812. Or was that in 1943?
We LOVE ninja cat!
I had a ninja cat once. Murphy blended in with the bark of the tree in my back yard so well.
Sometimes had to wait until he moved to see him. great jumper too. He had no trouble taking down birds as they flew by.
Nothing like my blonde cat Mandy, He just chased dogs and played fetch when he wasn’t to busy stealing money.
In the picture, I think I see the cat’s face peeking around the sink cabinet somewhat blending in with the baseboard. The picture is not clear enough for me to be sure though
I can still see you.
I see… these are the insufferable people who actually found Waldo in the Land of Many Waldos. They think they’re so clever. Let’s see… there might be a whisker by the doorjam. Or perhaps I’m meant to infer the cat from claw marks on something…
In this picture there are eleventeen cats. None of them can be seen.
Brer Fox, you’ve been in the box before, but DDD, this is your first time, I believe! Here’s your card, now hold it up in front of your beak. Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Cheshire!
Coked Up Spidermonkies is the name of my Rolling Stones cover band.
Mine is called Rock of Ages.
Mine is called Sympathy for the Decrepit.