T is putting the hammer down and I love it. I call him Hammer-T now. He was never really overly permissive with L, he’s just naturally nice and calm – a problem I don’t have, so I’ve been Hammer-Allison forever. But this new, angry, fed-up Hammer-T is just the greatest. One of the things I always loved about T was his innate niceness. It was so foreign to me and a perfect balance to my innate bitchiness. Who could have guessed I’d be so thrilled to see him toss it aside and join me on the dark side?
T is focusing his hammer on any disrespectful behavior of L’s. Any back talk, rude noises or faces, ignoring of requests will be met swiftly by Hammer-T. These things were always met by Hammer-Allison (which, in truth, is just regular Allison), but my hammer has become ineffectual, and compared to T’s it’s a little pink thing with a squeaky voice.
With Hammer-T around, I get to be calm! And Hammer-T doesn’t let anything slide. The slightest rudeness and L gets the Hammer. At first, L didn’t know what was happening. He didn’t listen to a simple request and T came down on him. HARD. L was so confused. A few minutes later when L made a face at me, down came the hammer. I feel very special getting all this bodyguarding by my husband against my 3-year-old.
So, I’m a happy gal with a mean husband and L had better get in line as he now has Mean Mommy and Mean Daddy to contend with. But, with Mean Daddy around, I can play nice every once in a while. Imagine that!
I predict good things to come of this. After the initial backlash, of course. 😉 Sorry, I’m a realist!
Just told my oldest yesterday – get it together or I will shut.you.down. The look in his eyes was total understanding – not fear (we’re not going to hurt him, just take away every privilege that he considers a birthright) – simply an acknowledgement that he was way across the line and it was in his best interest to adjust his attitude. He’s been around the block long enough to know that it’s no fun to send mom and dad into hammer mode, but he forgets from time to time and we have to tighten up so that he can relax. Strange, but true.
Just remember to include love and emapthy with the authority. For the most part you want to lead, not punish. Though a great consequence can work wonders. Loss of screen time is ours and even though he doesn’t get much to begin with – though summers can get out of control – it totally transforms him.
Very exciting! I hope it continues to be effective.
YAY T! We like it, we love it, we want some more of it!
[…] it’s new Hammer T, maybe it’s just the age and he’s coming out of one phase and entering a new one. Maybe […]