I shouldn’t watch sad television

So I don’t normally watch Packed to the Rafters, but last week I got sucked into watching the episode where someone died. It took the whole hour to get to the point of the characters death, and yes I sat there and watched the whole episode just to see who died. And then I cried. I cried for a character I didn’t know on a show I never watch. Not just cried, but sat there heaving huge sobs out of my body, to the point where Mick who just walked into the room asked me if I was laughing, my shoulders were shaking so much.

So you would think, knowing that I cried at the death, that I might avoid watching the show tonight, when they have the funeral on. But did I? No, of course not. Five minutes into the show, and I’m sitting there with tears welling up in my eyes, and they haven’t even gotten to the funeral yet. This does not bode well for the rest of the episode (ten minutes left, funeral still to come).

So why do I do this to myself. Why do I watch or read things that I know are going to make me cry? And, because of the crying, will make me feel like crap afterwards? There are no good feelings that come out of all this crying, just heartache. And it makes me scared. It makes me think about Mick, or lil Snotface dying. And that doesn’t just bring tears to my eyes, but that brings the outright bawling. I don’t honestly know how I would cope. But it certainly does make me appreciate the ones I love so much more. So what I want to say is – make sure that you tell the people that you love, just how much you love them – every single day. Don’t let a moment pass. That’s me on my soapbox, stepping down now, to go and tell Mick just how much I love him. Who would have thought it would be a television show that would make me realise that.

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