Fear Dimension continued, see Day 127
2) Fear of causing reaction
When I look at this heading, I realize that this is not specific, and as it is specifically the negative reactions of spite that I am in fear of, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to protect the integrity of my own consciousness by generalizing my fears and skating over specificity, within which there exists the possibility of actual change through self forgiveness.
Therefore I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself within this self forgiveness to not have seen or realized this starting point of fear of change.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear a spite reaction directly targeted at me. In this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in advance of the situation in actual reality to fear that I will be unable to do otherwise than take this personally.
Therefore I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the experience of my own automation that I have accepted and allowed as who I am. And within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately stand up in the belief that this is my nature that I cannot change.
I commit myself to the realization within and as and through all the characters of me that change is possible, that change is what has happened through my acceptance and allowance throughout my experience in this life, that through change it is that I have come to be and to become this who I am. I commit myself to realize that change is my decision and that also not change my decision too.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear change and for within that fear to not allow myself to see and realize and understand and take back to myself my own responsibility for changing who I am and have become, so that in each and every moment in my breath, I am here with my decision with myself of how to be according to the situation in physical reality, rather than according to an alternative reality of the mind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize and understand that in fearing causing reactions in another that within this I am accepting and allowing the belief that I am responsible for the reactions in another being, and that therefore within this belief, that I hold another being responsible for the reactions that will come up in me.
Within this I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that my fear of my own experience of automation comes out of my abdication of my own responsibility for my own beliefs that I have accepted and allowed as well as my own reactions as feelings and emotions that come up in me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that this belief in others as responsible for my feelings and emotions is a form of blame in which I justify my abdication of my self-responsibility.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize and understand clearly that the very starting point of ‘this has nothing to do with me’ is my definition of a relationship in which who I am is defined according to the external conditions and the environment of other beings, so that within this I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in my own posture as a victim and therefore in my judgment stood in righteousness, where all along if I were to look self-honestly at who I am within this, my relationship to this has been as ‘I will have nothing to do with this.’ And therefore hidden in my victimhood there is an attitude of secret superiority, in which I have been actually the one in superiority and judgment and as the rejecting one.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the situation as more-than others, and for defining who I am as superior to this.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize or see or understand that I have accepted and allowed myself to become separated from who I am by participating in this energy game in which I go from a negative experience of myself as powerless blaming and as a victim into secret power and superiority as in standing off and above from this as a positive experience inside myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see or realize or understand the secret spitefulness that I have lived within the character of victim.
I commit myself to end this game of energy that I have played.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to guard the integrity of myself within and as ego and consciousness by suppressing from myself my secret relationship towards the world, of spite and superiority, wrapped in suppression of a fear of exposure as a victim, and for allowing in myself within my scope of awareness in my conscious mind only a fear of the reaction of spite from others.
I commit myself to change myself within this relationship that I have accepted and allowed as fixed in which I have basically accepted and allowed that because things are the way they are according to my interpretation and my judgment, that therefore I will do nothing. I commit myself to change this not doing anything to change the situation.
Therefore in this situation that I have accepted and allowed as real in which I stand within a fear of spite, I stop and breathe, I realize and understand and recognize this aspect of this character that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed by, and so I stop and in this moment change.
Changing the Character of the World
The Quantum Mind
This series is for a serious student that cares about LIFE and endeavour to understand how creation functions in fact in specific details.
4 Count Breath as Emergency Tool of Self-Support
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