Losing The Final Forty

I’m wallowing in self pity, emotionally eating, recognizing it for what it is, and not stopping myself.  That can’t be good.

The weekend was great – celebrated my oldest’s birthday, indulged a little – I don’t pass up chocolate cake with buttercream icing – had an almost perfect Paleo dinner (at a Mexican restaurant).  I indulged a little today…until my company left to go back to Mississippi…and then I experienced all my normal emotions: sadness, loneliness, isolation…

I didn’t really think too hard about it until I looked down and realized I’d eaten half a bag of organic, white corn, sea salt tortilla chips…and then had another piece of cake for a mid-afternoon snack…and then a small piece of pizza for dinner…and now more tortilla chips with avocado (that counts as healthy, right?)…oh, and the rootbeer float…

I’m wallowing in self-pity, and I know I’m wallowing…I’m reveling in my wallowing…I’m allowing my wallowing…

Tomorrow, however, I will get up, put my big girl panties back on, and get back to business…

Today, I’m going to wallow.