Seasonal Wardrobe Detox

As we begrudgingly prepare summer frocks, shorts and bikinis (which were worn…oooh all of twice) for hibernation, now seems like a good time to initiate the seasonal wardrobe cull. To some this is the perfect opportunity to fully utilise the label maker/fabric steamer/clip-lid boxes and emulate an IKEA catalogue spread. To others, it generates feeling of dread as the never-ending knitwear drawer unravels itself, covering every surface inch of the bedroom.

What is a seemingly straightforward update often becomes an emotional and conflicting task, resulting in over/under culling and causes much angst over the old adage: what if it comes back into fashion? Be warned, once started, it’s difficult to abort the wardrobe clear out mission.

I love a wardrobe cleanse and find even the task of refolding the aforementioned jumper drawer therapeutic, regardless if any eliminations have been made. I’ve adopted a consultancy role and gladly advise friends on their incoherent collections. I relish the Simon Cowell ‘it’s a no from me’ authoritative position, employing a cruel-to-be-kind policy, which can be quite cathartic itself.

Despite excelling in wardrobe management, I still aspire to the illusion of a perfectly coordinating capsule collection. I envisage, in the event of a missed alarm or impromptu catch-up, I could fall out of bed into an effortless ensemble, eliminating that disappointing mid-morning ‘outfit regret.’ I know people who have reached this pinnacle and digitally catalogue outfits on their phone and set-up home collection/direct debited dry cleaning accounts. I’m yet to reach these dizzy heights, but each season I aspire to this harmonious wardrobe relationship.

I think a wardrobe purge not only makes your hanger-space less of a premium but also cleanses the soul and signifies a new-start. Let’s be honest, January is never a good month to kick-start ‘new year, new me’ regimes. A change in clocks is a much better time to implement fresh starts. Additionally, empty hangers in the wardrobe rationalise new purchases, which can be justified fully when twinned with that fact that you’ll wear it all winter (which let’s face it, is the bulk of the year).

In light of the fact that holiday season is someway off, it’s comforting to know a change is as good as a rest.

When embarking on this seasonal challenge, make sure you tackle it fittingly by following these guidelines:

Ensure you have enough time; this is not a spur-of-the-moment chore to do just before bed.
Arm yourself with storage solutions. Kicking your boots as far as they’ll go under the bed does not constitute suitable stowage.
Emulate Carrie and categorise your clothing piles into: Keep/Store/Sell/Charity. If you’re being really thorough add a dry-clean/alterations pile to reinstate occasional or forgotten items.
Utilise a benchmark: would I want to bump into my ex-boyfriend wearing it? There’s no room for mediocre outfits.
Be ruthless; don’t keep too many things ‘just in case.’
If it’s too small, get rid of it. You’ll either torture yourself with it or squeeze into it with unflattering consequences.
Enlist the help of some trusted friends; ensure a rigorous honestly policy by providing wine.
Don’t enlist the help of your mum, good as her intentions are, she would still have you in your brownie uniform if it were up to her…
…similarly don’t ask your boyfriend, he will become instantly bored and won’t have strong convictions on skinny versus straight jeans.